The world's leading London pub-based fantasy football league
Vasco De Beauvoir made no transfers in the second window
Manager: Mr Alistair Drummond (ENG)
Since: 2005 (founder member)
Trophy cabinet: League winners in 2005, league and cup double in 2010
Sympathies: Kidderminster Harriers
| Schwarzer, M | FUL | £0.5m |
| Young, L | QPR | £10m |
| Bosingwa, J | CHE | £14m |
| Hutton, A | AVL | £0.5m |
| Boyce, E | WIG | £0.5m |
| Pilkington, A | NOR | £10m |
| Nzonzi, S | BLR | £0.5m |
| Kuyt, D | LIV | £20m |
| Gardner, C | SUN | £3m |
| Aguero, S | MCY | £40m |
| Lita, L | SWA | £0.5m |
| £99.5m |
FC Testiculadew made no transfers in the second window
Manager: Mr James Norris (ENG)
Since: 2011
Trophy cabinet: empty
Sympathies: Everton
| Szczesny, W | ARS | £2m |
| Kaboul, Y | TOT | £5.5m |
| O’Shea, J | SUN | £5.5m |
| Shorey, N | WBA | £0.5m |
| Clark, C | AVL | £0.5m |
| Mata, J | CHE | £31m |
| Dempsey, C | FUL | £5.5m |
| Fellaini, M | EVE | £4.5m |
| W-Phillips, S | QPR | £8m |
| Rooney, W | MUN | £28m |
| Dzeko, E | MCY | £5.5m |
| £96.5m |
The Dan Terry Seduction made no transfers in the second window
Manager: Mr Dan Terry (ENG)
Since: 2010
Trophy cabinet: empty
Sympathies: Kidderminster Harriers
| Hart, J | MCY | £20m |
| Fabio | MUN | £1m |
| Elokobi, G | WLV | £0.5m |
| King, L | TOT | £0.5m |
| Martin, R | NOR | £0.5m |
| Tiote, C | NEW | £0.5m |
| Malouda, F | CHE | £26m |
| Larsson, S | SUN | £6.5m |
| Osman, L | EVE | £5m |
| Crouch, P | STO | £8m |
| Odemwingie, P | WBA | £19m |
| £87.5m |
Lurliners made no transfers in the second window
Manager: Mr Luke Jones (ENG)
Since: 2011
Trophy cabinet: empty
Sympathies: Liverpool
| Howard, T | EVE | £9m |
| Gibbs, K | ARS | £6m |
| Enrique, J | LIV | £5m |
| Taylor, S | NEW | £9m |
| Collins, J | AVL | £8m |
| Young, A | MUN | £17.5m |
| Modric, L | TOT | £13m |
| Muamba, F | BOL | £0.5m |
| Johnson, B | NOR | £2.5m |
| Di Santo, F | WIG | £11m |
| Fletcher, S | WLV | £0.5m |
| £82m |
Just Put Carles made no transfers in the first or second window
Manager: Mr Carles Duz (CAT)
Since: 2011
Trophy cabinet: empty
Sympathies: Barcelona, Fulham
| Cech, P | CHE | £20m |
| Wilson, M | STO | £0.5m |
| Ward, S | WLV | £0.5m |
| Robinson, P | BOL | £0.5m |
| Walker, K | TOT | £0.5m |
| Gerrard, S | LIV | £26.5m |
| Silva, D | MCY | £22m |
| Coleman, S | EVE | £2.5m |
| Anderson | MUN | £0.5m |
| Zamora, B | QPR | £15.5m |
| Chamakh, M | ARS | £1.5m |
| £90.5m |
Despite the lack of seating there was no standing on ceremony at Friday’s auction.
Once the bidding was underway 30 players were sold in record time.
The high stakes of the Kenna aside early, managers were left to indulge in the comparatively risk-averse diversion of Leicester Square’s Empire Casino.
“An excellent turnout and a very professional operation indeed. Thank you to managers for making it such a memorable evening,” said the Chairman, trying to piece together events the next day from a wad of crumpled receipts in his wallet.
As is always the case after a transfer window, some new signings have jumped at the opportunity of a fresh start to take the game by the throat, while others…
Smash and grab raid of the window has to go to the Spartak Mogadishu boss, who picked up Papiss Demba Rodney Cisse for £500k.
“Yarrr! He be a fine vassal,” said the Spartak gaffer in a feudal moment.
Full teams and this week’s points will be available later in the week.
|
£15m |
Ox-Chamberlain, A | Young Boys |
| Pogrebnyak, P | Headless Chickens | |
|
£14m |
Sagna, B | Lokomotiv Leeds |
|
£13m |
Cisse, D | Pikey Scum |
|
£12m |
Pienaar, S | Bala Rinas |
| Pennant, J | Thieving Magpies | |
|
£11m |
Morison, S | Headless Chickens |
| Graham, D | Spartak Mogadishu | |
| Cahill, T | Newington Reds | |
|
£10m |
The Yak | Bala Rinas |
A strike in the seventh minute of stoppage time was not enough to keep Gabriel Obertan at Thieving Magpies.
The French midfielder scored one of six goals this week for the beleaguered club to catapult them out of the relegation zone for the first time since November.
Fellow Magpie Darren Pratley notched his first of the season too, but both players had the hangover from hell when the manager handed them their P45s the next day.
“It’s just too little, too late and to be honest, after buying Obertan in a phone bid, his contribution to the club hasn’t paid back the cost of the UK evening call,” said the ‘Pies gaffer while waiting until 7pm to call Karl Henry’s agent.
Another French, midefield, goal-scoring casualty this week was Charles N’Somnia.
The Newington Reds boss jettisoned the playmaker just hours before he netted his first of the term.
“Luckily there’s a lot of high-class talent out there to be signed,” said the Reds manager before meeting Youssouf Mulumbu for lunch at Subway.
Wales defender Ashley Williams has hit out at the Judean Peoples’ Front manager after details of an internal club memo were leaked to the media.
Williams, who was released by JPF ahead of this Friday’s transfer window, has taken exception to the heave ho and the contents of the memo written by the manager himself.
“I also have someone from Swansea – get rid of him.”
In the leaked communique the JPF boss says: “Could you remove the bloke that I have from QPR and Cleverly. I also have someone from Swansea – get rid of him.”
The £2.5m-rated defender, who has played every minute of the campaign so far this season, said: “If he can’t see that I’m giving my all week in week out, then he’s just incompetent and thoughtless.
“His man management skills are a shambles, that’s why the only person who’s playing well for him this season is Robin van Persie, and even he wants to leave.”
In his defence the JPF manager said: “It’s a case of sour grapes. The axe has swung and he needs to deal with it.”
Early indications are that suitors will be queuing up to sign Williams, with eight managers needing to fill holes in defence.
A full list of available players will be released by Friday morning.
Jermaine Defoe and Louis Saha playing paper, scissors, stone to see who’ll stay at PSV Mornington.
Vedran Corluka’s personal belongings being thrown out of a first-floor, terraced-house window by a teary-eyed Polonia Forsyth boss.
Andrey Asharvin in a cravat and smoking jacket telling the Hairy Fadjeetas gaffer “I go Mother Russia where make small tax and cheap car insurance”.
Just some of the footage we’d like to bring you today ahead of 12pm’s transfer submission deadline.
Instead, it’s the picture of the half-dressed girl with the developed quad again.
And Jim White making a rac1st slip of the tongue on live television.
“If you want to do business on Friday night send in your unwanted players by 12pm, otherwise you won’t be doing any business on Friday night,” said the Chairman while mixing cement in a disused warehouse.