THE Kenna League treasurer finds his team at the top of the table for what is possibly the first time in a seven-year management career.
Goals from Marouane Chamakh and Aaron Ramsey, and a brace from Stefan Jovetic saw Bala Rinas fire to the summit of fantasy football in the second round of the season.
Asked if he could keep his side first for the remaining 37 weeks of the campaign, the treasurer consulted his big-buttoned calculator with a receipt roll at the top.
“The chances of Marouane Chamakh popping up with goal every week are…tap, tap, tap, tap, tap, tap, tap, tap, tap, bzzzzzzzzz…slim to none,” he concluded.
Despite a best-ever Kenna performance from Nacer Chadli, Just Put Carles prop up the table, although this is understandable considering the manager didn’t attend the auction and had his team randomly selected from a list of remaining players after 17 people had bought their players at auction.
What demands more explanation is the position of five managers who all find themselves beneath not one but two sides – Hoxton Pirates and FC Testiculadew – picked by the computer from auction scraps because they failed to attend the most well-run event in Kenna history.
Fans are losing patience with the Lokomotiv Leeds manager-out, Fat Ladies manager-out, Piedmonte manager-out, Cowley Casuals manager-out and Still Don’t Know Yet manager-out.
Protest marches from lo
Weekly scores
|
This week |
||||
|
Manager |
Points |
Goals |
||
|
1 |
Bala Rinas | Lewis | 49 | 4 |
|
2 |
Headless Chickens | John N | 35 | 1 |
|
3 |
St Reatham FC | Mike | 34 | 1 |
|
4 |
Hairy Fadjeetas | Aiden | 32 | 2 |
|
5 |
Walthamstow Reds | Dudley | 26 | -00 |
|
6 |
Hoxton Pirates | Abdi | 24 | 2 |
|
7 |
Pikey Scum | Jack | 24 | 1 |
|
8 |
Dynamo Charlton | Alex | 23 | -00 |
|
9 |
Just Put Carles | Carles | 22 | 2 |
|
10 |
Lokomotiv Leeds | Ben S | 22 | 1 |
|
11 |
Piedmonte | Phil | 21 | -00 |
|
12 |
Fat Ladies | Ted | 21 | -00 |
|
13 |
Young Boys | Denney | 20 | -00 |
|
14 |
FC Tescticuladew | James N | 20 | -00 |
|
15 |
Sporting Lesbian | Ben M | 19 | 1 |
|
16 |
Team Panda Rules OK | George | 19 | 1 |
|
17 |
Judean People’s Front | Sholto | 19 | -00 |
|
18 |
Cowley Casuals | Stu | 19 | -00 |
|
19 |
KS West Green | Stix | 18 | 1 |
|
20 |
Still Don’t Know Yet | Pete | 15 | 1 |
|
Points |
Player | |||
| Player of the week |
15 |
Chadli, N – TOT – MID | ||
|
Club |
Just Put Carles | |||
Kenna table
