A NEW competition to find the worst knockout tournament team in fantasy football was unveiled today.
The Go For Broke Cup takes the only four teams in the Kenna not to qualify from the group/pool stage of the Canesten Combi Cup and pit them against each other to find out which manager really is the most hapless.
Unlike the slightly racist TV advert for a board game of the same name, the Go For Broke Cup will not see managers dress as Arabian oil sheikhs, get irritated by a casino win or welcome a stock price collapse.
Instead the four sides will play a further group/pool after which the bottom two will enter a playoff. The loser will win.
The Kenna chairman, whose team KS West Green are one of the four clubs to be involved, was quick to dismiss rumours the competition would overrun an already inefficient administration.
“The Go For Broke Cup is yet another way for us to determine the worst managers out there,” he said, with a nod towards the bosses of Hoxton Pirates and Fat Ladies who are both rooted to the foot of the Kenna League.
Elsewhere, the Sporting Lesbian manager made a case for a Kenna League and Canesten Combi Cup double this season by both topping group/pool A and extending his lead at the top of the table.
The Lesbian strike partnership of Alexis Sanchez and Graziano Pelle are the only pair in the league to both break 100 points. Their combined total of 236 points is over a century more than their nearest rivals.
Despite their zero-hours contracts policy, Cowley Casuals took advantage of another poor week in the steady decline of Bala Rinas to take second place, but still lay 76 points off the leaders.
Managers will be looking ahead to the season’s second transfer on Saturday 6 February, just over two weeks away.
Canesten Combi Cup – week five results
| 20-Jan-15 | Sporting Lesbian | 0 | 0 | Young Boys |
| 20-Jan-15 | Headless Chickens | 2 | 1 | Dynamo Charlton |
| 20-Jan-15 | Bala Rinas | 1 | 1 | KS West Green |
| 20-Jan-15 | Piedmonte | 1 | 1 | Just Put Carles |
| 20-Jan-15 | Cowley Casuals | 1 | 3 | Pikey Scum |
| 20-Jan-15 | Walthamstow Reds | 0 | 0 | Hoxton Pirates |
| 20-Jan-15 | St Reatham FC | 1 | 1 | Lokomotiv Leeds |
| 20-Jan-15 | Hairy Fadjeetas | 0 | 0 | Fat Ladies |
Canesten Combi Cup – final group/pool standings
| Group | A | |||||
| Pos | Team | Played | For | Against | Diff | Pts |
| 1 | Sporting Lesbian | 4 | 4 | 2 | 2 | 8 |
| 2 | Headless Chickens | 4 | 6 | 5 | 1 | 7 |
| 3 | Young Boys | 4 | 5 | 2 | 3 | 6 |
| 4 | Dynamo Charlton | 4 | 3 | 6 | -3 | 4 |
| 5 | Judean People’s Front | 4 | 4 | 7 | -3 | 1 |
| Group | B | |||||
| Pos | Team | Played | For | Against | Diff | Pts |
| 1 | Bala Rinas | 4 | 5 | -2 | 3 | 8 |
| 2 | Team Panda Rules OK | 4 | 5 | -4 | 1 | 7 |
| 3 | Piedmonte | 4 | 7 | -4 | 3 | 5 |
| 4 | Just Put Carles | 4 | 2 | -3 | -1 | 3 |
| 5 | KS West Green | 4 | 3 | -9 | -6 | 2 |
| Group | C | |||||
| Pos | Team | Played | For | Against | Diff | Pts |
| 1 | Pikey Scum | 4 | 9 | -3 | 6 | 12 |
| 2 | Walthamstow Reds | 4 | 6 | -4 | 2 | 7 |
| 3 | Cowley Casuals | 4 | 9 | -9 | 0 | 4 |
| 4 | Still Don’t Know Yet | 4 | 9 | -13 | -4 | 3 |
| 5 | Hoxton Pirates | 4 | 0 | -4 | -4 | 2 |
| Group | D | |||||
| Pos | Team | Played | For | Against | Diff | Pts |
| 1 | Lokomotiv Leeds | 4 | 12 | -4 | 8 | 10 |
| 2 | St Reatham FC | 4 | 4 | -11 | -7 | 7 |
| 3 | FC Tescticuladew | 4 | 12 | -5 | 7 | 6 |
| 4 | Hairy Fadjeetas | 4 | 7 | -8 | -1 | 4 |
| 5 | Fat Ladies | 4 | 0 | -7 | -7 | 1 |
Kenna table – week 20 of 37
Weekly scores
| Manager | Points | Goals | ||
| 1 | Cowley Casuals | Stu | 54 | 1 |
| 2 | St Reatham FC | Mike | 51 | 1 |
| 3 | Sporting Lesbian | Ben M | 51 | 0 |
| 4 | Pikey Scum | Jack | 47 | 3 |
| 5 | Judean People’s Front | Sholto | 44 | 2 |
| 6 | Team Panda Rules OK | George | 41 | 3 |
| 7 | Piedmonte | Phil | 37 | 1 |
| 8 | FC Tescticuladew | James N | 36 | 2 |
| 9 | Just Put Carles | Carles | 32 | 1 |
| 10 | Young Boys | Denney | 30 | 0 |
| 11 | KS West Green | Stix | 29 | 1 |
| 12 | Bala Rinas | Lewis | 27 | 1 |
| 13 | Headless Chickens | John N | 22 | 2 |
| 14 | Lokomotiv Leeds | Ben S | 20 | 1 |
| 15 | Still Don’t Know Yet | Pete | 20 | 1 |
| 16 | Dynamo Charlton | Alex | 19 | 1 |
| 17 | Hairy Fadjeetas | Aiden | 19 | 0 |
| 18 | Walthamstow Reds | Dudley | 18 | 0 |
| 19 | Fat Ladies | Ted | 16 | 0 |
| 20 | Hoxton Pirates | Abdi | 14 | 0 |
| Points | Player | |||
| Player of the week | 20 | Valencia, E – WHM – STR | ||
| Club | Piedmonte |
