Lesbian shaves it for Casual encounter


SPORTING Lesbian all but secured their second Kenna League title in three years despite a late rally from Cowley Casuals.

A goal from Leonardo Ulloa and assist from James Milner were not enough from Casuals to overturn a 17-point deficit. It would take shockers of historical significance from Sporting’s Alexis Sanchez and Ashley Westwood at Wembley this Saturday to reverse their 11-point lead.

“It was very close at the end so we had to shave it,” said the Sporting Lesbian manager, expounding the kind of attitude that makes him a champion and Hairy Fadjeetas mid-table also rans.

Graziano Pelle (39 starts), Raheem Sterling (39) and Sanchez (38) have been the stand out performers behind Sporting’s success, but the rest of side all put in near-weekly appearances to contribute.

October transfer window recruits Nathan Dyer and Ahmed Elmohamady were consistent rather than amazing, although the manager will never let the chairman forget that derogatory assessment of Elmo.

Missing out on the league, the Casuals manager can take solace in his Canesten Combi Cup final victory over Dynamo Charlton.

Dynamo’s February transfer window signing Harry Kane levelled the score, so the tie was decided on the controversial points system. The Young Boys manager is unlikely to be impressed.

Looking at the gaps between teams in the rest of the top four, it’s unlikely Saturday’s match will change much unless Lokomotiv Leeds’ Kieron Gibbs can bother the referee more than Walthamstow Reds’ Theo Walcott.

For after 10 trophyless years the Reds manager is leading the inaugural Unfair Play league table.

“We’ve got a nice glass cabinet ready, but we’re not letting Erik Pieters near it!” quipped the Reds boss.

The chairman reminded managers to attend tomorrow evening’s – slightly premature – Kenna end-of-season awards evening at The Duke of York in Mayfair.

“Since the event’s in Mayfair we’re going all out on the Champions League final first goalscorer sweep entry: it’ll be raised to £5,” moneybagged the chairman.

There will also be a £1 first goalscorer sweep in tomorrow’s Europa League final.

Full scores and tables available from The Rub.

Canesten Combi Cup – final result

Cowley Casuals 1 – 1 Dynamo Charlton
Casuals win 26-20 on points

Kenna table week 37

Kenna week 37 - 26 May 2015
Kenna week 37 – 26 May 2015

Weekly scores

Manager Points Goals
1 Walthamstow Reds Dudley 44 4
2 Piedmonte Phil 36 1
3 Bala Rinas Lewis 34 3
4 Lokomotiv Leeds Ben S 34 0
5 Young Boys Denney 32 1
6 Pikey Scum Jack 32 1
7 Team Panda Rules OK George 29 2
8 FC Tescticuladew James N 29 0
9 Judean People’s Front Sholto 28 0
10 Cowley Casuals Stu 26 1
11 Headless Chickens John N 23 0
12 Just Put Carles Carles 23 0
13 Hoxton Pirates Abdi 22 1
14 Fat Ladies Ted 20 2
15 Dynamo Charlton Alex 20 1
16 Sporting Lesbian Ben M 20 0
17 Hairy Fadjeetas Aiden 19 0
18 KS West Green Stix 19 0
19 St Reatham FC Mike 12 1
20 Still Don’t Know Yet Pete 11 0
Points Player
Player of the week 18 Walcott, T – ARS – MID
Club Walthamstow Reds
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Author: The chairman

Ascended to the chairmanship of the Jeff Kenna League Fantasy Football League in 2007 after co-founded the league in London in August 2005.