GABRIEL Jesus will be top of many shopping lists ahead of the final Kenna League transfer window tonight.
The Brazilian striker has made a big impact following his move to England a few weeks ago.
Of the top four teams in the table, only Islington Sports Islam & Leisure can sign Jesus without triggering the Titus Bramble forfeit ruling.
The managers of Thieving Magpies (Yaya Toure), FC Testiculadew (David Silva) and Sleptember XI (Raheem Sterling) would all have to release a high-value player as a wildcard tonight to bid for the Brazilian.
Peter Crouch and Jay Rodriguez are the other most notable strikers currently without a Kenna club.
League leader ‘Pies released Dimitri Payet ahead of the window, but there are slim pickings in midfield, where Victor Moses looks the most attractive available player.
With only one wildcard permitted, the ‘Pies manager is taking a long hard look at Pedro.
Another Chelsea player, Marcus Alonso, will captivate interest for managers after a defender. Chambers, Ward, Prodl and Rojo lead the ragtag alternatives.
At 20th in the table, the Piss Poor manager is yet to release Adam Johnson.
Fifteen-year-olds, dude.
The available player list and managers’ remaining budget are available from The Rub.
Clubs – players released – remaining budgets
Sleptember XI – none – 32.5
SGTNHT – Terry, Success – 31.5
Burqini – Bill Cosby, Perez – 29.5
Dynamo – Butland, Nolito – 27
Reds – Amat, Shaw, Khazri – 24.5
AJFC – Rodwell, Oscar – 22
ISIL – Iheanacho – 20.5
Leeds – Albrighton – 19
FCT – Boufal – 19
Sporting – no bonus – 17
Bala – Bravo, Ogbonna, Cazorla, Fer – 14
Magpies – Payet – 16
WNS – none – 13.5
JPF – Otamendi, Zouma, Studge, Rooney, Diouf – 11
Young Boys – Bolasie, Pereya, Defour, Diomande – 10
JPC – no bonus – 9.5
Panda – no bonus – 7
Piss – no bonus – 6.5
Scum – no bonus – 4.5
Cowley – no bonus – 4
2G1C – no bonus – 2.5
Monkeys – no bonus – 2
Cheerio – players who moved in January
Thieving Magpies
Payet to France
Young Boys
Patrick van Aanholt from Sunderland to Palace (not Bramble tied)
Dynamo Charlton
Snodgrass from Hull to West Ham (not Bramble tied)
Two Goals One Cup
Ivanovic to Russia
Adam Johnson Fan Club
Oscar to China
Fonte from Southampton to West Ham (not Bramble tied)
Piss Poor
Berahino from West Brom to Stoke (not Bramble tied)
Kenna table week 22
Narcozep Cup playoff results
Sleptember XI 9 – 19 Lokomotiv Leeds
Burqini Pool Party 19 – 14 Wandsworth Network Solutions
Kenna table week 23
