Midfield mediocrity is the trademark of the trophyless Kenna manager.
Bit-part, maybe men midfielders are as popular with managers at auction as Alex McLeish wearing a Wolves shirt on a night out in Digbeth.
Relying mainly of their creativity, these wingers, number 10s and false nines are more susceptible to the vagaries of form than any other Kenna player.
So it comes as little surprise that Dynamo Temple scoop the best midfield award because of a player who in previous seasons has frustrated managers with his unpredictability.
Now out of the shadow of his fellow countryman, Nani put in some of his best performances since the Thriller video and charged to 171 points this season. What a snip at £8m!
Perhaps more important an accolade is the ‘Mid-table Midfield Award’, which is awarded to a team who started the season with Joe Cole, Petrov, Milner and Hitzlsperger. Must be something to do with the altitude in Nepal.
To stand any chance of winning the Kenna it’s imperative to have a back five as solid as Sepp Blatter’s gold toilet.
The 2010/11 award for best defence goes to champions Young Boys. The indomitable Cech, Vidic and Bale were ably supported by PFA Young Player of the Year Award-nominated Seamus Coleman and 38-games-this-season Roger Johnson.
At the tail end, Spartak Mogadishu’s Green, Warnock, Ryan Taylor, Kyrgiakos and Figueroa left a lot to be desired.
Thank you to managers who attended last night’s end-of-season debrief on the pavement outside an exclusive central London venue.
The Chairman would say it was memorable, but frankly details at the end are as blurred as the purpose of the FIFA ethics committee.
Those not present missed a remarkable story about sneaking out of a wedding in France to watch the Champions League final, drinking a bottle of Beaujolais and causing a scene when they wouldn’t let him bring two local peons into the reception after the match.
If this sounds like you then you’re just the calibre of manager the Kenna is looking for. We need more of you to offest the smug-as-hell-even-though-their-shirt-is-tucked-into-their-pants brigade.