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Manager: John N
International form
2006 Claudio Caniggia World Cup – n/a
2008 John Jensen Euros – n/a
2010 Dr Khumalo World Cup – n/a
2012 Emanuel Olisadebe Euros – 7/14
2014 Emerson World Cup – 17/18
2016 Jean Alain Boumsong Euros – n/a
2018 Dimitri Kharine World Cup – 2/16
Sympathies: England
| GK | Donnaruma | ITA | 6 |
| DF | Hummels | GER | 0.5 |
| DF | Pepe | POR | 0.5 |
| DF | Robertson | SCO | 2 |
| DF | Soyuncu | TUR | 0.5 |
| MF | KDB | BEL | 21 |
| MF | Gigi W | NED | 5 |
| MF | Grealish | ENG | 0.5 |
| ST | Kramaric | CRO | 9 |
| ST | Morata | SPA | 16 |
| ST | Benzema | FRA | 24 |
| Total | 85 |
Since: 2011
Trophy cabinet: empty
Form
2011/12 – 11th
2012/13 – 16th
2013/14 – 9th
2014/15 – 16th
2015/16 – 18th (relegated)
2016/17 – 21st (relegated)
2017/18 – 11th
2018/19 – 21st (relegated)
Sympathies: Liverpool
| Nick Pope | BUR | £ 5.00 |
| Andrew Robertson | LIV | £ 20.00 |
| George Baldock | SHU | £ 4.00 |
| David Luiz | ARS | £ 5.00 |
| Jonny Evans | LEI | £ 0.50 |
| Bertrand Traore | AVA | £ 5.00 |
| João Moutinho | WOL | £ 3.00 |
| Christian Pulisic | CHE | £ 17.00 |
| Richarlison | EVE | £ 11.00 |
| Danny Ings | SOU | £ 26.00 |
| Patrick Bamford | LEE | £ 0.50 |
| £ 97.00 |
| Nick Pope | BUR | £ 5.00 |
| Andrew Robertson | LIV | £ 20.00 |
| George Baldock | SHU | £ 4.00 |
| David Luiz | ARS | £ 5.00 |
| Jonny Evans | LEI | £ 0.50 |
| Fred (loan) | MUN | £ 1.00 |
| João Moutinho | WOL | £ 3.00 |
| Christian Pulisic | CHE | £ 17.00 |
| Richarlison | EVE | £ 11.00 |
| Danny Ings | SOU | £ 26.00 |
| Patrick Bamford | LEE | £ 0.50 |
| £ 93.00 |
Manager: John N (Yorkshire)
Since: 2011
Home ground: Guillotine Way
Training facility: The Coop
Trophy cabinet: empty
Form
2011/12 – 11th
2012/13 – 16th
2013/14 – 9th
2014/15 – 16th
2015/16 – 18th (relegated)
2016/17 – 21st (relegated)
2017/18 – 11th
Sympathies: Liverpool
Darts music: Hala Madrid y nada mas
Starting budget: £16m
Spend: N/A
Player sales: N/A
Remaining budget: £16m
| Schmeichel, K | LEI | £11.00 |
| Kompany, V | MCY | £5.00 |
| Trippier, K | TOT | £15.00 |
| Coleman, S | EVE | £8.00 |
| Koscielny, L | ARS | £9.00 |
| Jorginho | CHE | £6.00 |
| Shelvey, J | NEW | £7.00 |
| Mooy, A | HUD | £5.00 |
| Lingard, J | MUN | £17.00 |
| Sturridge, D | LIV | £9.00 |
| Vietto, L | FUL | £2.00 |
| £94.00 |
| Schmeichel, K | LEI | £11.00 |
| Kompany, V | MCY | £5.00 |
| Trippier, K | TOT | £15.00 |
| Coleman, S | EVE | £8.00 |
| Koscielny, L | ARS | £9.00 |
| Jorginho | CHE | £6.00 |
| Shelvey, J | NEW | £7.00 |
| Mooy, A | HUD | £5.00 |
| Lingard, J | MUN | £17.00 |
| Sturridge, D | LIV | £9.00 |
| Vietto, L | FUL | £2.00 |
| £94.00 |
| Alisson | BRA | £ 2.00 |
| Gimenez, J | URU | £ 6.00 |
| Strinic, I | CRO | £ 4.00 |
| Kjaer, S | DEN | £ 3.00 |
| Tadic, D | SRB | £ 13.00 |
| di Maria, A | ARG | £ 9.00 |
| Shaqiri, X | SUI | £ 5.00 |
| Silva, B | POR | £ 0.50 |
| Lukaku, R | BEL | £ 33.00 |
| Rashford, M | ENG | £ 10.00 |
| Dembele, O | FRA | £ 10.00 |
| £ 95.50 |
Manager: John N (Yorkshire)
Since: 2011
Home ground: Guillotine Way
Training facility: The Coop
Trophy cabinet: empty
Form
2011/12 – 11th
2012/13 – 16th
2013/14 – 9th
2014/15 – 16th
2015/16 – 18th (relegated)
2016/17 – 21st (relegated)
Sympathies: Liverpool
Darts music: Hala Madrid y nada mas
What the chalkstripes in Kenna HQ speculations department are saying: Tempered the incredible bargain of Alvaro Morata when the player became unexpectedly available by signing a Roma player. Piss poor transfer window attendance record – 100/1
Player sales: Valencia to Sporting Lesbian for £0.5m, Barkley to FCT for £0.5m
| Lloris, H | TOT | £10.00 |
| van der Hoorn, M | SWA | £0.5m |
| Bertrand, R | SOT | £4.00 |
| Schindler, C | HUD | £17.00 |
| Mangala, E (TW2) | EVE | £0.50 |
| Ox-Chamberlain, A | LIV | £5.00 |
| Ibe, J | BOU | £3.00 |
| Allen, J (TW2) | STO | £6.00 |
| Morata, A | CHE | £6.00 |
| Rondon, S | WBA | £9.00 |
| Sanchez, A | MUN | £22.00 |
| £92m |
|
Lloris, H |
TOT |
£10.00 |
|
Valencia, A |
MUN |
£9.00 |
|
Bertrand, R |
SOT |
£4.00 |
|
Schindler, C (TW1) |
HUD |
£17.00 |
|
Ox-Chamberlain, A |
LIV |
£5.00 |
|
Ibe, J |
BOU |
£3.00 |
|
Snodgrass, R |
WHM |
£6.00 |
|
Barkley, R |
CHE |
£6.00 |
|
Morata, A |
CHE |
£6.00 |
|
Rondon, S |
WBA |
£9.00 |
|
Sanchez, A (TW1) |
ARS |
£22.00 |
|
£97m |
|
Lloris, H |
TOT |
£10.00 |
|
Valencia, A |
MUN |
£9.00 |
|
Bertrand, R |
SOT |
£4.00 |
|
Kolarov, A |
ROM |
£8.00 |
|
Ox-Chamberlain, A |
LIV |
£5.00 |
|
Ibe, J |
BOU |
£3.00 |
|
Snodgrass, R |
WHM |
£6.00 |
|
Barkley, R |
EVE |
£6.00 |
|
Morata, A |
CHE |
£6.00 |
|
Rondon, S |
WBA |
£9.00 |
|
Origi, D |
LIV |
£0.50 |
|
£66.50 |
Manager: John N (Yorkshire)
Since: 2011
Home ground: Guillotine Way
Training facility: The Coop
Trophy cabinet: empty
Kenna Index rating: 0.641 – 20th
2011/12 – 11th
2012/13 – 16th
2013/14 – 9th
2014/15 – 16th
2015/16 – 18th (relegated)
Sympathies: Liverpool
Darts music: Hala Madrid y nada mas
| Stekelenburg, M | EVE | £5.00 |
| Sagna, B | MCY | £5.00 |
| Cresswell, A | WHM | £3.00 |
| Vertonghen, J | TOT | £10.00 |
| Johnson, A (TW2) | HMP Kenna | £21.00 |
| Mane, S | LIV | £22.00 |
| Zaha, W | CRY | £8.00 |
| Ibe, J | BOU | £6.00 |
| Januzaj, A | SUN | £4.00 |
| Berahino, S | WBA | £9.00 |
| Welbeck, D | ARS | £0.50 |
| £93.50 |
No changes.
Formation: 3-5-2
Remaining budget: £6.5m
In
Scott Arfield – Burnley midfielder – £0.5m
Out
Adam Johnson – HMP Kenna midfielder – free
Formation: 3-5-2
Remaining budget: £6m
Manager: John N (Yorkshire)
Since: 2011
Home ground: Guillotine Way
Training facility: The Coop
Trophy cabinet: empty
Kenna Index rating: 0.641 – 20th
2011/12 – 11th
2012/13 – 16th
2013/14 – 9th
2014/15 – 16th
Sympathies: Liverpool
Darts music: Hala Madrid y nada mas
Season preview in one sentence (on 27 September): When a manager Brambles himself with two Read Madrid players, what further punishment can Kenna HQ mete out?
| Lloris, H | TOT | £8m |
| Kompany, V | MCY | £14m |
| Janmaat, D | NEW | £6m |
| Williams, A | SWA | £7m |
| Ramos, S | RMA | £0.5m |
| Schneiderlin, M | MUN | £4m |
| Lallana, A | LIV | £0.5m |
| Cleverley, T | EVE | £0.5m |
| Adam, C | STO | £0.5m |
| Costa, D | CHE | £50m |
| Jerome, C (TW1) | NOR | £0.5m |
| £91.5m |
In
Jerome, C – Norwich striker – £0.5m
Out
Ronaldo, C – Real Madrid striker – free
Remaining budget: £13m
No changes.
Remaining budget: £13m
Manager: John N (Yorkshire)
Since: 2011
Last season: 9th
Trophy cabinet: empty (best finish – last season)
Sympathies: Liverpool
Darts music: Everyday Normal Guy – Jon Lajoie
Season preview in one sentence: Led the Kenna for a period of last season before falling into mid-table obscurity, and appears to have assembled a side capable of doing the same again.
| Courtois, T | CHE | £4.00 |
| Kompany, V | MCY | £13.00 |
| Rangel, A | SWA | £1.00 |
| Schlupp, J (TW1) | LEI | £5.00 |
| Shaw, L | MUN | £13.00 |
| Cazorla, S | ARS | £15.00 |
| Gouffran, Y | NEW | £3.00 |
| Huddlestone, T | HUL | £5.00 |
| Lallana, A | LIV | £18.00 |
| Adebayor, E | TOT | £10.00 |
| Rodriguez, J | SOT | £0.50 |
| £87.00m |
In
Schlupp, J – defender, LEI – £5m
Out
Ward, J – defender, CRY – £0m
Remaining budget – £14.5m
No transfers.
Remaining budget: £19.5m
Manager: John N
Nationality: English
International honours: none
| Muslera, F – URU – GK | £4.00 |
| Srna, D – CRO – DEF | £3.00 |
| Toure, K – CIV – DEF | £3.00 |
| Zapata, C – COL – DEF | £0.50 |
| Debuchy, M – FRA – DEF | £4.00 |
| Silva, D – ESP – MID | £12.00 |
| Fellaini, M – BEL – MID | £1.00 |
| Lallana, A – ENG – MID | £9.00 |
| Candreva, A – ITA – MID | £1.00 |
| Podolski, L – GER – STR | £9.00 |
| Ronaldo, C – POR – STR | £43.00 |
| £89.50 |
Manager: John N (Yorkshire)
Since: 2011
Last season: 16th
Trophy cabinet: empty (best finish – 11th in 2011/12)
Sympathies: Liverpool
Darts music: Everyday Normal Guy – Jon Lajoie
Outlook (on 24 August 2013): Detractors would say he’s never won any silverware, not even a Manager of the Month award. Apologists would argue he’s never been relegated or even got a Turkey of the Month award. Everyone would agree the Kenna career of the Headless Chickens manager has been one of absolute mediocrity, and the stats back this up.
In his third attempt to win, well, anything, the Chickens boss picked up one of the bargains of the auction in Yaya Touré for half a million. Fortunate, since the rest of the midfield look unable to score points at this level – Schneiderlin plays in the holding role, Gardner plays in defence and Sigurdsson rarely plays at all.
Further uncertainty hangs over the front pair. Will Michu continue to enjoy the rich vein of form that saw him score 19 goals last season? Will Craig Bellamy take a five iron to his team mates?
At the back things look more solid, and not just because they have an extra right back in Gardner. Cole, Baines, McAuley and Bassong are likely to start almost every game this season. The Szczesny circus act looks set to continue.
Perhaps where the Chickens manager needs to be most careful is the transfer window. Last October he jettisoned a performing Theo Walcott in favour of Raheem Sterling. Walcott ended the season as one of the top midfielders with 179 points. Sterling scored a below-par 68.
He may as well have used Bellamy’s golf clubs.
[youtube=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5PsnxDQvQpw&w=420&h=315]
| Szczesny, W | ARS | £7m |
| Baines, L | EVE | £17m |
| McAuley, G | WBA | £6.5m |
| Bassong, S | NOR | £6.5m |
| Cole, A | CHE | £11m |
| Gardner, C | SUN | £6.5m |
| Sigurdsson, G | TOT | £5.5m |
| Schneiderlin, M | SOT | £4.5m |
| Toure, Y | MCY | £0.5m |
| Michu | SWA | £27m |
| Mitroglou, K | FUL | £12.5m |
| £104.5m |
Starting budget: £11m, remaining budget: £3m, net loss: £8m
| Out | In | ||||||
| Pos | Player | Team | Sold | Pos | Player | Team | Value |
| STR | Bellamy, C | CAR | Free | STR | Cisse, P | NEW | £8m |
| Out | In | ||||||
| Pos | Player | Team | Sold | Pos | Player | Team | Value |
| STR | Cisse, P | NEW | Free | STR | Mitroglou, K | FUL | £12.5m |
