Bala Rinas

Manager: Lewis (Wales)

Twitter name: @jsl105

Since: 2007 (committee member – Treasurer)

Last season: 8th

Trophy cabinet: Empty (highest league position – last season)

Sympathies: Wrexham

Darts music: C.R.E.A.M. – Wu Tang Clan

Outlook: Scarred by relegation in his debut at the helm of The Trinny Men in 2007/08, the Welshman took time out from the pressure of Kenna management before assuming the reins of Bala Rinas last season, and with some success. His follow up campaign began with some respectable business, but with a red card for Agger already and the fire of Grant Holt and Djibril Cisse up front, discipline could be an issue.

(B) = player awarded under the Titus Bramble ruling

Jaaskelainen, J WHM £0.5m
Agger, D LIV £15m
Neville, P EVE £4m
Koscielny, L ARS £0.5m
Fabio QPR £0.5m
Hernandez, P SWA £10m
Duff, D FUL £16m
Johnson, B NOR £1m
Bale, G TOT £26m
Ba, D CHE £42m
Di Santo, F WIG £0.5m
 Total £116m

Second transfer window – 1 February 2013

Out     In
Hooiveld, J SOT £0.5m Fabio QPR £0.5m
Nani MUN £15m Hernandez, P SWA £10m
McClean, J SUN £14m Johnson, B NOR £1m
Holt, G NOR £9m Ba, D CHE £42m

First transfer window – Friday 26 October 2012

Out     In
Savic, S (B) MCY £10m Koscielny, L ARS £0.5m
Kaboul, Y TOT £6.5m Hooiveld, J SOT £0.5m
Moses, V CHE £12m Duff, D FUL £16m
Marveaux, S NEW £2m Bale, G TOT £26m
Cisse, D QPR £12m Di Santo, F WIG £0.5m
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Missing Cameroon keeper named in forfeit squad

African football pitch
Drusille? Drusille?: Missing Cameroon keeper makes Bramble squad

THE CAMEROON Olympic women’s footballer missing from the athlete’s village has been named in the Titus Bramble squad.

Drusille Ngako is suspected to have absconded along with six other Cameroonian athletes to stay in the UK illegally.

However, if a manager falls foul of the Titus Bramble ruling at Wednesday night’s auction, the 25-year-old goalkeeper could find herself turning out in the Kenna.

“Surely for Drusille a chance to play in the Kenna would be a more alluring prospect than making fake designer clothes in a Birmingham sweatshop for 12 hours a day. Although, in the eight years the league’s been running no one’s ever been awarded a goalkeeper under the Titus Bramble ruling, so managers will have no cause for concern at her inclusion, unless they’re a complete muppet,” said the Chairman, overlooking the accepted calibre of Kenna manager.

The hunt for the most mediocre players in the Premier League started a month ago and has claimed 16 footballers, including some names from big clubs.

“As only one player can be signed from each club, Titus Bramble players like Stefan Savic, Josh McEachran and Bebe will be a thorn in the side of managers,” chortled the Chairman, keeping his fingers crossed.

Titus Bramble squad

Goalkeeper

Drusille Ngako (free agent)

Defenders

Titus Bramble (Sunderland)
Stefan Savic (Man City)
Joe Flanagan (Liverpool)
Shane Ferguson (Toon)
Gabriel Tamas (West Brom)

Midfielders

Josh McEachran (Chelsea)
Fabian Delph (Aston Villa)
Joey Barton (QPR)
Gary O’Neil (West Ham)
Steve De Ridder (Southampton)

Strikers

Marouane Chamakh (Arsenal)
Bebe (Man U)
Apostolos Vellios (Everton)
Callum McManaman (Wigan)
Leroy Lita (Swansea)

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