How to pick a winning tournament team

Andres Iniesta
Tempting at this time of year: Andres Iniesta scores goals and gets assists

MANAGING a team in regular fantasy football contests offers little true variance.

Sitting at your computer and picking the same two strikers 100,000 others have, while the War Office reminds you it’s bin day tomorrow is unpreferred.

Having to then spend the tournament logging on to make transfers and, God forbid, ‘pick captains’, is quite frankly unacceptable.

In the Olisadebe auction, managers lock horns in that most competitive of arenas, the pub.

Once the auction’s over, managers are free to enjoy the tournament in the patented Ruud Gullit ‘bars and discotheques’ style.

For the uninitiated, here an idiot’s guide to the rules:

  • Each manager has £100m to buy 11 players in a 4-4-2 formation
  • Each team may have no more than one player of each nationality
  • Managers breaking the rules are subject to the Titus Bramble Ruling.

The second rule in particular makes the Olisadebe ultimately challenging. Buying a bottom-drawer player from a top team is folly.

Going around the table, each gaffer takes it in turns to introduce a player to the bidding. The auction ends when every team is filled.

The Olisadebe ‘Brambles’ will be announced next week.

What experience tells us

Looking below at the top performers from the last international tournament, the Doctor Khumalo 2010 World Cup, the immediate thought is: what the bejabbers was someone up to spending £31.5m on a holding midfielder like Schweinsteiger?

During a domestic season, steady Eddies like Bastian ‘Pig-overseer’, making regular appearances and nicking the odd goal can be useful.

But in tournament football, where an absolute maximum of six games awaits, the only successful midfielders are those scoring just as many goals as their striking counterparts (Wesley Sneijder).

Forwards regularly finding the net and back fives from organised teams picking up clean sheets offer the best return on investment.

Creative wing backs getting assists and goals, while their side keeps clean sheets, are a handy addition.

The second thing you’ll notice from the table is that some household names went for chicken feed. There are three reasons for this:

  1. all the other managers had bought their quota from that country (Iker Casillas)
  2. those at the auction simply hadn’t considered that player of value (Thomas Muller)
  3. the player had initially been bought for a large sum, forfeited through the Titus Bramble Ruling and bought on the cheap later in the evening (David Villa)

Top European’s from the 2010 Khumalo World Cup in South Africa

Name

Position

Country

Points

Auction price

Thomas Muller

Striker

Germany

42

£0.5m

Wesley Sniejder

Midfielder

Netherlands

40

£36m

David Villa

Striker

Spain

39

£0.5m

Iker Casillas

Goalkeeper

Spain

35

£0.5m

Gerard Pique

Defender

Spain

33

£22m

Carlos Puyol

Defender

Spain

33

£1m

Sergio Ramos

Defender

Spain

28

£1m

Mesut Ozil

Midfielder

Germany

26

£0.5m

Miroslav Klose

Striker

Germany

25

£7m

Manuel Neuer

Goalkeeper

Germany

24

£0.5m

Phillipe Lahm

Defender

Germany

22

£13.5m

Arne Friedrich

Defender

Germany

22

£1m

Arjen Robben

Midfielder

Netherlands

21

£15m

Bastian Schweinsteiger

Midfielder

Germany

21

£31.5m

Andres Iniesta

Midfielder

Spain

20

£19m

Giovanni van Bronckhorst

Defender

Netherlands

20

£5m

Follow the auction live on Twitter @jeffkennaleague or #eurosauction on Tuesday 29 May from 7pm (BST)

Look out for more news and features about the Olisadebe in the build up to the auction.

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Wednesday deadline for transfer submissions

The window
Peeping through the window

Managers have until 12pm on Wednesday (1 February) to submit their unwanted players.

Submissions can be made directly to the Chairman or by emailing [email protected].

Bidding will begin for available players next Friday at the second, and final, transfer night this season at 7.30pm.

The rules remain the same as for the first transfer night.

“This is the first ever Kenna event on a Friday and we’re excited,” said the Chairman, before dismissing claims that television scheduling had forced the administration’s hand.

“I must remind you that any manager found re-signing someone who has previously played for them this season will incur the Titus Bramble ruling. We look forward to finding someone who didn’t read this far.”

A clutch of top-scoring available players can be found below.

Strikers

S Morison (Budgies) – 93
The Yak (Yakburn) – 90
Danny Graham (Swans) – 87
Holt (Budgies) – 78
Helguson (QPR) – 77

Midfielders

Richardson (Mackems) – 62
Ryan Taylor (Toon) – 62
J Allen (Swans) – 54
Formica (Blackburn) – 52
Jordi Gomez (Wigan) – 51

Defenders

Heitinga (Everton) – 49
Bardsley (Mackems) – 44
Hibbert (Everton) – 43
Senderos (Fulham) – 43
McAuley (WBA) – 43

Goalkeepers

Lindegaard (Man U) – 39

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The Friday Poll: Who’ll be the biggest flop?

The Friday Pole
Stanisław Zbyszko - The Friday Pole

Stevie G was last season’s biggest disappointment, fetching £34m and stumping up just 12 more points than the Brambler.

This summer’s auction resulted in fewer big-money buys, but always holds the promise of an equally disenchanting performance.

Ahead of tomorrow’s big push, pick who you think will be the most underwhelming player of the term below.

[polldaddy poll=5391270]

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The thorn in your side

Gary Mabbutt
"What do you mean I've already bought a Tott... but... Titus who?"

The most infamous collection of names since the Nomenklatura has arrived.

Managers trying to buy an illegal player at next week’s auction will face the ignominy of fielding one of the Titus Bramble offerings below.

The players have been picked in the spirit of Bramble philosophy: they’ll play sometimes, they may even score on occaision, but most of time they’ll do less actual work than Sven Goran-Eriksson.

This season’s Bramble ruling has been tidied up to avoid a repeat of January’s ugly incident that left the Barking manager without a job.

The updated ruling – highlights

Managers will invoke the Bramble ruling if they buy, or try to buy:

  • More than one player from a particular Premiership club – the most expensive of the two will be replaced.
  • A player that causes them to exceed the £100m budget – their most expensive player, regardless of who they bought last, will be replaced.

Once they’ve undergone the Bramble ruling, the offending manager may not take part in the next round of bidding and must buy a pitcher of beer (get the next round).

Managers found to be consistently making illegal bids to drive up the value of players will invoke the Titus Bramble ruling.

Full league rules and regulations, including changes to the Bramble ruling, will be shared soon.

The Titus Bramble list – 2011/12

Under the updated ruling, Bramble players in each position will be awarded in the order they appear below.

If a manager has a player from the same club as the first available Bramble, then the next Bramble down will be awarded.

Each Bramble player will cost £0.5m.

Goalkeepers

1 John Ruddy Norwich
2 Jose Moreira Swansea City
3 Paddy Kenny QPR

Defenders

1 Titus Bramble Sunderland
2 Danny Shittu QPR
3 Zak Whitbread Norwich City
4 Angel Rangel Swansea City
5 Rafik Halliche Fulham
6 Christophe Berra Wolves
7 Stotirios Kyrgiakos Liverpool
8 Pablo Ibanez West Bromwich Albion

Midfielders

1 Shaun Wright-Phillips Manchester City
2 Josh McEachran Chelsea
3 Emmanuel Frimpong Arsenal
4 Christian Poulson Liverpool
5 Hendry Thomas Wigan Athletic
6 Darron Gibson Manchester United
7 Michael Tonge Stoke City
8 Dan Gosling Newcastle United

Strikers

1 Michael Owen Manchester United
2 Ji Dong-Won Sunderland
3 Emile Heskey Aston Villa
4 Conor Sammon Wigan Athletic
5 Magaye Gueye Everton
6 Sam Vokes Wolves
7 Roman Bednar West Bromwich Albion
8 Mamady Sidibie Stoke City

Bramble players may be subject to change before the auction night, depending on transfers.

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