FOLLOWING publication of the PFA team of the year, the Daily Telegraph has posted the worst team of 2015/16.
Always keen to identify the the biggest gaffes by Kenna League managers, we’ve assessed each player.
Goalkeeper – Simon Mignolet (KS West Green)
DT said: Sometimes seems like an easy target but the stats don’t do him any favours at all.
Has the second-worst save percentage in the Premier League this season, saving just 60 per cent of the shots on target he has faced, while he has also made three errors leading to opposition goals, costing Liverpool a total of six points against Norwich, West Brom and Sunderland.
Without those mistakes Liverpool would be a point off fourth with a game in hand.
Kenna season: Signed by the chairman for £9m, the Belgian has broken the 100-point mark, bettering the likes of Brad Guzan, Lukasz Fabianski, Adrian.
Defender – Alan Hutton (unsigned)
DT said: Wins have been extremely rare for Aston Villa this season, but they have been non-existent with Hutton on the field.
He has made 25 appearances and Villa have won none of those games. Without him they have three wins from nine.
Oh, and he scored two own goals.
Kenna season: Even Kenna managers have learnt not to touch ‘The Scottish Cafu’ with a bargepole.
Defender – Micah Richards (Team Panda)
DT said: Was meant to add experience, stability and steel to the Villa defence but has done quite the opposite. The awful team he has captained have conceded 48 goals in the 22 games he has played; that’s 2.2 goals per game with him compared to 1.4 without him.
Neither is good enough but Richards has basically managed to make Villa worse.
Kenna season: The Pandas manager hasn’t made any transfers since signing Richards for £6m at the August auction for a return of 52 points.
Defender – Sebastian Coates (unsigned)
DT said: Was a mainstay for the first half of the season in the defence of a team that was giving Aston Villa a real run for its money as late as the end of November.
The only thing of note Coates did in his 16 appearances was score the above own goal. He was then deemed surplus to requirements, which is quite an achievement in a defence as leaky as Sunderland’s.
Kenna season: The once-promising Uruguayan was ignored by Kenna managers.
Midfielder – James McClean (unsigned)
DT said: Far from the most popular man in English football, McClean has rather had a season to forget.
In a Tony Pulis team where crosses are so important, McClean has attempted a whopping 182 crosses, but 141 have failed to find a team-mate. He only has two assists to his name all season.
Kenna season: Hasn’t appeared in a Kenna team since finishing midtable with PSV Mornington in 2012/13.
Midfielder – Jonjo Shelvey (Dynamo Charlton)
DT said: Shelvey could have been a shrewd purchase at £12 million, but is starting to look like a complete waste of money.
He has scored just one goal from 56 shots all season and looks unfit at present. It speaks volumes that it isn’t all that surprising that Newcastle have improved since he was dropped.
Kenna season: Snapped up for £0.5m in August by Dynamo and a regular starter until the last few weeks, although 40 points isn’t much to shout about.
Midfielder – Gareth Barry (Wandsworth Network Solutions)
DT said: Barry has been a solid Premier League player for years on end, but is perhaps starting to look a little off the pace.
He doesn’t provide his defence with enough protection, and has made more mistakes leading to an opposition chance than any other player in the top flight this season. People are talking about a potential change at the top at Goodison Park but perhaps one is needed at their heart.
Kenna season: A return of 61 points so far this term could be considered ample for the £0.5m August price tag.
Midfielder – Jack Grealish (Young Boys of Vauxhall)
DT said: Thought he had the world at his feet before this season and did not realise the hard work he needs to put in to become the player he can be.
Scored in September and then failed to add another goal or assist for the whole season. Villa have lost every single game he has appeared in.
Kenna season: The £3m August signing was carried by the league leaders until the February transfer window, where he was realised on a free.
Midfielder – Eden Hazard (Northern Monkeys)
DT said: The only thing anywhere near as surprising as Leicester’s title charge is how woefully bad Chelsea and their player of the season from last year, Eden Hazard, have been.
Hazard has produced a grand total of zero goals and three assists across 26 appearances this season and just looks like he wants out of the club. His heart isn’t in it any more.
Kenna season: At £39m Hazard was one of the most expensive players at the August auction. The Monkeys manager has kept faith in the Belgian, which has gone emphatically unrewarded.
Striker – Emmanuel Adebayor (Pikey Scum)
DT said: Earns over £100k-a-week yet has scored just a single goal since signing for Crystal Palace, who have won only one league game this year – a game in which Ade played no part.
Kenna season: Overlooked until the February transfer window when the Scum boss took a punt for an undisclosed fee. Has been chugging along at a respectable 2.8 points a week since and on the verge of a Narcozep Cup final appearance.
Striker – Cameron Jerome (Northern Monkeys and Headless Chickens)
DT said: Only a handful of players has had more ‘clear cut’ chances this season than Jerome, yet he has only three goals to his name.
A striker who doesn’t score. Now that’s exactly what a team fighting the drop need.
Kenna season: The half-million-pound signing scored just 18 points for Northern Monkeys before flogging him on for the same fee.
Was bought by the Chickens manager to replace Ronaldo when a rumoured move to England didn’t materialise. Jerome’s contribution of 50 points has not been enough to steer Chickens from almost certain relegation.
