ROUTS don’t come much more convincing than FC Testiculadew’s league win two seasons ago, but the same manager is poised to scoop another title with ease albeit without making such a mockery of the other competitors.
Goals from Edin Dzeko, Jonjo Shelvey, Mesut Ozil and a brace from Juan Mata have put FC Testiculadew 61 points clear of the nearest challenger with three weeks to go – all but delivering the trophy to the self-confessed Tactical Brambler.
For a while the Piedmonte manager appeared to be making a genuine case for a grandstand finish, but like a Nigerian striker getting in his 4×4 after an ambiguous conversation with a club suit, that looks to have petered out.
Despite also showing strong signs of promise in the manager’s fifth Kenna season, Judean Peoples’ Front failed to live up to the task. Now more than 100 points off the leaders, the Anders Brievik lookalike‘s woes add fuel to the argument that to be truly competitive at this level a manager needs both kidneys.
The organ grinder is still calling the tune for the dancing monkeys battling it out for fourth. The debutant manager of Team Panda Rules OK saw his side come to within two points of the league treasurer’s team Bala Rinas. Defending champions Sporting Lesbian also compete.
A remarkable turnaround this season has come from Young Boys of Vauxhall. The manager made eight changes to his struggling side at the February transfer window and this week finds his side climbing one place further from the danger zone.
Taking to social media last week, the Young Boys manager was quick to point out the prolific form of controversial signing Martin ‘the ginned up lollypop lady’ Demichelis in comparison to other more recognised names.
The KS West Green manager was only to happy to remind his midfielder Alex Oxlade-Chamberlain of this little stat when he bumped into him at a charity dinner last night.
@jeffkennaleague The ginned up lolly pop lady has now scored as many EPL goals this season as The Ox, Ashley Young, Cisse, Michu and Caroll
— Andrew Denney (@andenney) April 22, 2014
Kenna table
Weekly scores
Manager | Points | Goals | ||
1 | FC Testiculadew | James N | 53 | 5 |
2 | St. Reatham FC | Mike | 41 | 3 |
3 | Lokomotiv Leeds | Ben S | 34 | 3 |
4 | Team Panda Rules OK | George | 33 | 1 |
5 | Bala Rinas | Lewis | 30 | 0 |
6 | Piedmonte | Phil | 28 | 1 |
7 | Spartak Mogadishu | Abdi | 28 | 1 |
8 | Young Boys | Denney | 27 | 0 |
9 | Judean Peoples Front | Sholto | 26 | 1 |
10 | Northern Monkeys | Hugo | 25 | 1 |
11 | Headless Chickens | John N | 23 | 1 |
12 | Pikey Scum | Jack | 22 | 2 |
13 | Newington Reds | Dudley | 22 | 1 |
14 | Sporting Lesbian | Ben M | 22 | 1 |
15 | PSV Mornington | El Pons | 20 | 1 |
16 | KS West Green | Stix | 20 | 0 |
17 | Dynamo Charlton | Alex | 18 | 0 |
18 | Rapids De Cullons CF | Jorge | 13 | 0 |
19 | Just put Carles | Carles | 11 | 0 |
20 | Still Don’t Know Yet | Pete | 10 | 0 |
21 | This is Sparta…Prague | Rich | 10 | 0 |
22 | Hairy Fadjeetas | Aiden | 6 | 0 |
23 | Dulwich Red Sox | Luke | 5 | 0 |
Points | Player | |||
Player of the week | 15 | Wickham, C – SUN – STR | ||
Club | Unsigned |