“Like Paul the Octopus in 2010, Barney the Psychic Owl is set to become one the prevailing features of the tournament. We’re very proud to be associated with him and any additional television revenue he brings,” said an Olisadebe spokesman at the launch.
Asked to interpret these signs at the launch event, organisers were evasive.
“Barney can not only call the results of football matches, but also pick winners at the track. The dark-haired fellow in Wood Green Weatherspoon’s who sold it to us was very explicit about that and also very convincing,” continued the spokesman, showing the nonplussed novelty runners in the 4.15 at Uttoxeter.
TESTICULADEWLAND have lost their appeal to replace Alexandros Tziolis with another player ahead of the Emmanuel Olisadebe Euros, which start this Friday.
Tziolis has been confirmed as definitely going to not be going to the tournament in Poland and Ukraine after a public vote found 66 per cent in favour that ‘T-land’ should keep the player.
The T-land boss believes the appeal’s failure was not due to ‘footballing reasons’, and slammed rival managers as the team gathered at Victoria coach station ahead of travelling to Eastern Europe.
“I’m naturally dissapointed, but will stand by the decision, although I’m concerned that it hasn’t been made for footballing reasons.
“Testiculadewland wish to emphasise again their apology for any misunderstanding. Tactical brambling is culturally-acceptable in the land of testicles.
“Criticism from Euro Euro Bunga Tour is unfair: this is the same fella that brambled on Neil Lennon. I’m really sorry for what happened and for the disappointment I’ve caused the Kenna, and particularly to the Chairman, whom I respect and whom I love.”
Kenna HQ claim the main reason the appeal had lost was due to managers wanting to stamp out chances of ‘tactical Brambling’ affecting future auctions.
“We’re making excellent progress establishing a Kenna Ethics Committe. FIFA have a similar mechanism, and they’re the model of integrity,” said the Chairman, from Jack Warner’s Caribbean yacht.